Mental toughness expert details how you can stay strong when everything around you feels unsettled

Permacrsis describes the feeling of living through ‘an extended period of instability and insecurity’, and has been revealed by Collins Dictionary as one of the words that perfectly sums up 2022. 

From political instability to the war in Ukraine, climate change, and the cost-of-living crisis, this Collins Word of the Year highlights the huge impact that world events are having on us as individuals.

In order to survive and thrive, author and leading authority on mental toughness, Penny Mallory, said that people need to dig deep to develop the resolve to manage the stress, chaos and pressure of the ‘permacrisis’ that we are living through.

The British author, who is about to row the Talisker Whiskey Atlantic Challenge in December 2023, told Femail: ‘Mental toughness isn’t about being aggressive, strong and macho. 

‘Some of the quietest, gentlest people are mentally tough.’ 

Here, Penny explains how we can better mange the stress and insecurity to be able to enjoy life, and remain optimistic, by taking a new perspective.   

Collins Dictionary chose the word ‘Permacrisis’ as Collins Word of the Year 2022. It is the feeling of living through a period of war, inflation and political instability (stock image)

DON’T WALLOW 

Resilience is our ability to adapt, recover quickly and bounce back when things don’t go as we had planned or had hoped. 

Penny said: ‘Resilient people don’t wallow or dwell on failure; they acknowledge the situation, learn lessons from mistakes and move forward. 

‘They are mentally tough and they are more likely to thrive.’

Wallowing means that you feel sorry for yourself and that you are attached to the idea that nothing will ever work out well for you. 

This is counter-productive as it doesn’t allow you to acknowledge why something failed and how you can avoid this in the future. 

START TO THINK OF ‘FAILURE’ AS ‘LEARNING’ 

A lot of people get so caught up in their fear of failure that it prevents them from taking risks and learning new things. 

Penny believes that changing the way we think of failure is key to mental toughness.

‘Instead of ‘failure’, change your perspective so that you see it as ‘learning’,’ she suggested. 

She explained: ‘No one ever started out being brilliant. Everyone learned their skills through exploration, deliberate practice, hard work, endeavour and resilience. 

‘Your actions and behaviours come from what you think, and how you think. To behave differently you have to think differently.’

BE PREPARED TO LEAVE YOUR COMFORT ZONE

‘Playing it safe and refusing to leave your comfort zone may be a recipe for failure, but risk is scary,’ explained Penny. 

‘Champions learn to open their minds to possibilities, managing risk and leveraging it to their advantage. 

‘By stepping outside your comfort zone there is no loss; you’ll succeed or learn from it, and both are big wins.’

The best way to step outside of your comfort zone is gradually, as this will increase your concentration and allow you to learn and master new skills along the way.  

REMEMBER THAT IT’S NOT ALL ABOUT ACADEMIC SUCCESS 

A lot of people get caught up in the fact that they didn’t do as well at school, college or university as they wanted to. 

Penny urges people to remember that academic qualifications are not the biggest factor in success.

Penny said: ‘Only 30 per cent of any achievement you make will be down to your skill, talent and intelligence, but 70 per cent of your achievement will be down to your mental toughness, focus, resilience and determination.’

It is these factors according to the British author that are what creates success. 

She encourages you to think about anyone you admire in business, sport, politics, media because they’ve all achieved their success through remained determination and commitment.  

TRY AND REGAIN A SENSE OF CONTROL  

Feeling like you’re in control of your life rather than a passenger is key.

From time to time, when things go wrong and everything around is uncertain we can feel like we are spiraling and struggle to know which foot to put forward. 

To see through the fog of uncertainty Penny suggested visualising how things could be if everything went your way. 

She said: ‘Create a picture of what you’re after. Set aside the things you can’t control and focus on the things you can.’ 

Doing this will keep your mind focused and help you get back in the driving seat as you see progress and find a path forward.  

GIVE 100 PER CENT COMMITMENT 

Some people avoid goals for fear of failure whilst others get bored or divert their attention away from them.

‘People think they are committed to doing or achieving something, but it is rarely a 100 per cent commitment. 

‘You need to give 100 per cent commitment, this is what will make all the difference to an outcome’ urged Penny. 

For example, something like taking an ice cold shower every day offers surprising physical and mental benefits to the way you think and behave. 

This is an exercise that is designed to practice tolerating discomfort, which helps to build discipline, resilience, commitment and determination.

LOOK AT A CHALLENGE AS AN OPPORTUNITY

You should try and view every challenge as an opportunity to learn something new. 

However, do remember that things will not always go your way, but there is always something to be learnt from whatever happens. 

Penny said: ‘Taking learning from every experience is so important. 

‘For example, in rallying they say, if you’re not crashing you’re not trying hard enough.

‘Sometimes you need to ‘crash’ to find your limit, and discover what is possible.’ 

• Penny’s book, 365 Ways to Develop Mental Toughness: A Day-By-Day Guide to Living A Happier And More Successful Life (John Murray) is released on 10th November 2022.