A mom-of-two has told how she lives like a fully-fledged 1950s-style housewife and her decision to quit the office was inspired by feeling neglected as a child. 

Alexia Delarosa, 29, from San Diego, is part of a growing movement of so-called ‘tradwives’ – short for traditional wives – whereby women live by old-fashioned gender stereotypes.

The Californian, who stays at home to cook, clean and look after the children while her husband goes out to work, said she adopted the homemaker mindset because her own mom wasn’t around enough when she was a kid.

She explained: ‘My mom worked and she also enjoyed time outside of our family home with friends. I have always wanted a more traditional model for my family. I loved the idea of a 50’s style family life, where the wife stays home to look after her husband and kids, and the husband goes out to work full time.

Alexia Delarosa, 29, from San Diego, is part of a growing movement of so-called ‘tradwives’ – short for traditional wives – whereby women live by old-fashioned gender stereotypes

The Californian said she adopted the homemaker mindset because her own mom wasn't around enough when she was a kid

The Californian said she adopted the homemaker mindset because her own mom wasn’t around enough when she was a kid

Poll

Do you think women belong at home in a ‘tradwife’ role?

  • Yes 95 votes
  • No 36 votes
  • Only if they want that life 241 votes

‘I remember watching films where the women would stay home to cook and clean for their husbands, and I thought it was a romantic and sweet life. It really resonated with me.’

While many women today juggle work and childcare, Alexia believes that an increasing number will turn to the tradwife lifestyle when they realize they can’t have it all.   

When she first started dating her husband, Matthew, 37, she made sure they talked about the kind of family and life they wanted from the outset. 

Luckily, their visions aligned and they both loved the idea of Matthew working full-time and taking care of the finances, while Alexia would stay home and look after various duties and future life.

Recalling how things progressed from there, Alexia said: ‘When I fell pregnant with our first son, Archer, now two, we decided very early on that I would stay home with him.

‘I had an at-home baking business which I did part-time, but when I fell pregnant with our second son, Arlo, one, I became fully focused on looking after the two boys, Matthew and our home.

‘I’ve always loved homemaking and I was more than happy to take on this role.’

Today Matthew owns and runs a coffee shop, and is constantly working, so Alexia ensures that everything is taken care of at home so that he doesn’t have to worry or think about it.

Alexia with her husband Matthew and their two sons Archer (left) and Arlo (right)

Alexia with her husband Matthew and their two sons Archer (left) and Arlo (right)

Offering further insight into her homemaker lifestyle, Alexia posts regular updates to social media

Offering further insight into her homemaker lifestyle, Alexia posts regular updates to social media

She said: ‘Matthew doesn’t have any duties assigned to him. I take care of all of the chores and ensure dinner is on the table for when he finishes work.

‘This is when we have a meal together as a family. I am quite particular in the way things are, so I like it to be this way too.

‘Matthew loves to be at work, and I love to be at home taking care of things. We both thrive in our roles and this arrangement works perfectly for us.’

To make life as a tradwife work, Alexia says it’s important to maintain a watertight routine. 

Detailing what an average day looks like, she says: ‘Our family is very routine-orientated. I wake up between 5:30 am and 6 am to get myself ready before the kids wake up.

‘Once they’re awake, at around 6:30 am, I do breakfast for the three of us and I love to make things from scratch. I then clean up and spend time playing with the boys in the house, we will sometimes take a trip to the coffee shop to see their dad or go to the park depending on their nap times.

‘I then do lunch, they have an afternoon nap, and during this time I do some laundry and figure out what we will have for dinner.

‘When I wake them up from their nap, we play around the house, I make dinner, do bath time, read their books and put the boys to bed for 7 pm. Once they’re in bed, I do one last clean through the house so it’s not a wreck when we wake up in the morning.’

Offering further insight into her homemaker lifestyle, Alexia posts regular updates to social media. 

One of her latest Instagram videos shows her making butter from scratch, while another captures her whipping together cinnamon toast crunch for breakfast.  

To make life as a tradwife work, Alexia says it's important to maintain a watertight routine

To make life as a tradwife work, Alexia says it’s important to maintain a watertight routine

The doting mom said: 'I've always known that there were things that I wanted to do differently for my own family compared to my upbringing'

The doting mom said: ‘I’ve always known that there were things that I wanted to do differently for my own family compared to my upbringing’

One of Alexia's latest Instagram videos shows her making butter from scratch

Since posting about her traditional lifestyle, Alexia says that she often receives negative comments from trolls.

Since posting about her traditional lifestyle, Alexia says that she often receives negative comments from trolls.

In a bid to maximize time with her children, Alexia has decided to home school her boys

In a bid to maximize time with her children, Alexia has decided to home school her boys

Since posting about her traditional lifestyle, Alexia says that she often receives negative comments from trolls.

She revealed: ‘People like to comment to tell me that being a full-time mom and wife isn’t a real job.

An antiquated trend or a the key to a happy life? What is a ‘tradwife’ 

Short for ‘traditional wife,’ the term describe a female home-maker who abides by traditional gender roles. 

The term was born in 2018, after the movement spread on social media, including Instagram and Youtube. 

A tradwife refers to a homemaker who loves nothing more than to clean, fix meals, tidy the house for her family while her husband is the sole bread earner of the household. 

It goes one step further than being a stay-at-home mother, with the woman being responsible with the more traditional aspects of housework and childcare.  

The term is controversial as it has been associated with far right rhetoric since some white supremacist tradwives came out as Trump supporters in 2018 

Source: Urban dictionary and The New York Times 

‘Some people even tell me that I am turning the clock back 50 years.

‘However, I don’t let it bother me because I know that the job I am doing is invaluable and it would be so expensive if we were to pay someone else to fulfil this role while I went out to work.

‘It is so important to have a parent in the home that is consistently there for the kids. I used to be a nanny and I was there for so many special and cute moments with the kids I was nannying for.

‘They were such special times and it made me realize that I wanted to be there for all of these moments when I had my own kids.’

In a bid to maximize time with her children, Alexia has decided to home school her boys. She also believes this will help keep them sheltered from negative ‘outside influences’.

Commenting on the decision, she said: ‘There are so many… things that can happen to them while they are out of my care. It really scares me.

‘For example, Archer had been at a party and playing with some kids, and by the time we were driving home, he was saying “you’re stupid” and we never say words like this at home.

‘It can happen so quickly it’s scary, so I want to be there to guide them and make sure they’re getting brought up the way we’d like them to. We can remain in control until they’re older and can judge characters for themselves.’

The doting mom concludes: ‘I’ve always known that there were things that I wanted to do differently for my own family compared to my upbringing.

‘I didn’t want my kids to feel like they had to escape their home, and I wanted them to be confident in the fact that their mom’s always around and things are always taken care of. I wanted them to have a stable and predictable home life.

 ‘I couldn’t imagine our family any other way.’



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