A relationship expert has revealed the top 10 questions you should be able to answer about your partner in order to ensure your relationship is healthy.

Professional relationship therapist Lauren Consul, from Los Angeles, California, has put together the questions in a video, which include how your partner likes their eggs cooked, based on conversations she has had with real-life couples over the years.

Lauren, 34, claimed if you can answer all the questions correctly about your partner, ‘you’re doing something right’.

After her TikTok video racked up 3.5 million views, it seems it has provided food for thought for couples all around the world.

Although she has generated lots of conversation with her list, Lauren admitted many people struggled with the questions, which also include how often your partner would like to have sex and how they flirt.

She said:  ‘A lot of people were able to answer a lot, but then some responses were saying they didn’t even know this about themselves!’

Lauren drew on her experiences speaking to clients during her career and how they influenced the questions she devised.

Lauren’s top 10 questions you should know about your partner 

1. Do you know how your partner likes their eggs cooked?

2. What would your partner consider to be a big purchase?

3. What was your partner’s dream job in primary school?

4. If you were to arrive at a bar before your partner, what would they want you to order?

5. How frequently would your partner ideally want to be having sex?

6. What is something that they’re very self-conscious about?

7. What direction do they like the toilet paper, over or under?

8. What is their biggest tell that they are stressed out?

9. How do they like you to flirt with them?

10. What is some of the biggest stresses in their life right now?

After many people told her they argued with their partner about ‘small things’, she pointed out arguments are usually less about the topic in hand and more about ‘what’s underneath the argument’.

‘The argument is actually about ‘do you see me’?, ‘do I matter’?’ she explained. 

‘A lot of couples will come in and have something small that they’re fighting about – little things that create big moments.’

However, she added that it’s important to stay aware of the little things relating to your loved one.

‘If you’re not paying attention to the smaller things as well, it’s like you’re not fully seeing your partner,’ she said.  

Having been a therapist for more than seven years, Lauren uses the phrase ‘death by a thousand paper cuts’ to describe relationships that fail.

She said: ‘You’ve got to notice those small things and make the effort.

‘We are wired to connect with people. When we don’t feel seen or heard by them it can create pain.’

For those who struggle to answer Lauren’s questions, she says it’s important to cultivate an ‘environment of curiosity’ and ‘never assume’. 

‘That’s a main tip for couples – asking questions and not assuming’, she said.

‘We are constantly evolving and answers change, don’t assume you already know.

‘They don’t have to be super deep questions; you can start simple. Ask them about their day and how they’re feeling

‘It also doesn’t have to be about the relationship.

‘For some couples it is high stakes to talk about their relationship so start conversations about other things like work, the media, TV and just life in general.

‘The disconnect can happen overtime but try and make sure you continue to engage with questions and don’t assume.’

Lauren Consul, 34 (pictured) has been a relationship therapist for seven years and has shared the top 10 questions you should be able to answer about your partner

Lauren made a TikTok video in which she shared the top 10 questions you should be able to answer about your partner - which has racked up 3.5 million views

Lauren made a TikTok video in which she shared the top 10 questions you should be able to answer about your partner – which has racked up 3.5 million views

Lauren make’s sure she applies the same thinking to her own relationship, especially she knows how easy it is to ‘get into the routine of life’.

She said: ‘I have two kids, so I know how easy it is to get in the routine of life.

‘We spend all of our time together but there are times when we might feel disconnected so it’s important to ask each other how we’re feeling.

‘Make the relationship as much of a priority as you do other things.

‘I’ll put notes on my phone next to my partners number, with things that I know he likes and things that we can do.

‘It’s so we can make the effort to do those little things.’



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