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You’re in The Womb,’ says the woolly-hatted manager of The Dreaming, as he shows me into a room with a rosy, cosy 1970s vibe. I could have been in The Mush-Room, The Mystic, The Wanderer or The Moon. In the bathroom, I find the ‘vagina shower’ — pink Moroccan waterproof plaster, open and inviting.
Later, Welsh songbird Charlotte Church, 37, who has just launched her retreat at The Dreaming, says they didn’t set out to create an official vagina shower. Its appearance just suggested the name.
Together with seven other women and one man, mostly in their early 40s, I’m here in the remote green depths of mid Wales for a long weekend, without wi-fi or phone signal, to experience Charlotte’s vision of healing.
Motives vary — one guest, from London, is keen to get away from her family for what she calls ‘me time’, another hates spas and is looking for a new kind of relaxation; a third had seen Charlotte Church’s Dream Build on Discovery+ and wants to experience the results for herself.
Frankly, I’m sceptical about anything ‘magical’ or ‘spiritual’ — but I’m reassured on seeing that the only magazine available is the New Scientist.
Totally wild: Welsh songbird Charlotte Church has just launched her retreat at The Dreaming in the remote green depths of mid Wales
Josa Keyes takes part in Church’s retreat, along with seven other women and one man. They’re there ‘to experience Charlotte’s vision of healing’
Charlotte tells us she came across what estate agents called ‘Laura Ashley’s Welsh mansion’ while trying to buy a field for glamping. Blown away by the 33 acres of mossy rocks, temperate rainforest and rushing streams, she decided to open a full-blown, year-round retreat.
‘It’s about connecting with nature,’ she says. ‘In our busy lives, we don’t have time. People are so distracted by everything. Our nervous systems are getting burned out.’
On a blackboard in the refectory, where we eat, there’s a list of ‘offerings’, from Nature Crafting and Celestial Blessings to Healing Dance, but this is a ‘self-guided’ retreat. You choose what to do. I recommend trying everything — and there’s also time for walks in the woods. You don’t have to call it ‘Forest Bathing’ if that’s not you.
On the first evening, general manager Lukus Robbins leads us up into the woods, where a fire burns in what Charlotte has named the ‘Court of the Holly King’ next door to the ‘Gateway to the Underworld’.
So far, so wacky — but there’s nothing forced about it. Lukus guides us through a short meditation and I begin to relax.
Next day, Charlotte leads our Morning Gathering and we divide up into pairs for Listening Partnerships — a five-minute exercise where we ask the other person how he or she is and actually listen to a truthful answer, unlike in normal life where we just say, ‘I’m fine’.
Above is one of the rooms at the retreat, which is housed in what estate agents called ‘Laura Ashley’s Welsh mansion’, Josa reveals
‘It’s about connecting with nature,’ Church says of the retreat
Describing mealtimes at the retreat, Josa says: ‘Each meal is a “feast” and the vegan food is prepared by Pete, the handsome chef’
Pictured left is the ‘vagina shower’. Josa says that Church didn’t set out to create an official vagina shower, but ‘its appearance just suggested the name’. On the right, guests soak in an outdoor tub
This warms us up for further sharing, and an atmosphere of trust and collaboration grows.
Our sole man, for example, performs the role of a (wild) bathing attendant, complete with bobble hat, standing up to his waist in the chilly Forest Pool, handing us women down the slippery rocks. I surprise myself by loving the tingling sensation of the water.
Each meal is a ‘feast’ and the vegan food is prepared by Pete, the handsome chef, who comes to tell us what we are eating, pink-faced from his stove.
My favourite ‘offering’ is the Sound Journey. We lie down in the Healing Room, where festival favourites Tim Wheater and Cherub Sanson have set up their instruments.
The gong, in particular, is an enjoyably shivery physical sensation. Tim plays the shruti box, an Indian instrument that delivers a rich drone; and Charlotte sings, wordlessly — her peerless voice weaving around the single note like smoke.
Josa says that the experience is ‘wacky’ but notes that ‘there’s nothing forced about it’
Pictured left is a waterfall on the grounds. Josa says that Church was ‘blown away by the 33 acres of mossy rocks, temperate rainforest and rushing streams’ on the site when she first visited it. On the right, a fire burns in what Charlotte has named the ‘Court of the Holly King’
Guests can choose from a list of ‘offerings’ that includes Nature Crafting and Celestial Blessings. Above is the retreat’s ‘Gateway to the Underworld’
Pictured left are stargazing chairs for guests, while pictured right is the tremendous view of the Nant Caethon valley
Josa in the Forest Pool. ‘I surprise myself by loving the tingling sensation of the water,’ she writes
There’s more singing at 6am on Sunday morning, as Charlotte roams the passages like a human alarm clock.
As dawn beckons, she issues us with silent-disco headphones and I choose the green dancefloor bangers channel, as does she. We follow her onto the lawn, with a tremendous view south down the Nant Caethon valley, and dance as if nobody’s watching — it hasn’t taken long for all self-consciousness to melt away.
On Monday morning, we meet for the Closing Circle. The most unexpected of us weep with emotional release as we discuss what the retreat has meant to us.
We are invited to write lines for a collective poem, as a gift for the next group, reflecting on the experience: ‘The Dreaming has helped the real me feel brave enough to break out’, is one line. Others talk about ‘shared moments, a circle of hearts’ and ‘clarity, peace, space, nature, unity, emotion, beauty, calm and rest’.
That’s some list and here’s the surprising part. I find myself agreeing with almost every word.
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